Ekev
20 Av 5773 / July
26-27, 2013
In this week’s portion, Ekev,
Moses continues his final speech to the Israelites before they depart to
conquer the Promised Land without him.
While he has a strong history of chastising the nation, he
is particularly harsh with the Israelites this week, telling them that they are
entering the Promised Land not because of their virtue – but rather, because of
the wickedness of the Land’s current inhabitants, and in fulfillment of the
covenant made with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.
Moses even goes so far as to resort to name-calling, referring to the
nation (as he has done before) as a “stiffnecked people.” For good measure, he throws in the following biting
critique: “As long as I have known you, you have been defiant towards God.”
Effectively, Moses is saying that if it were up to him, the
current Israelite generation wouldn’t be inheriting the Promised Land at all,
as they are undeserving. Needless to
say, not the most inspirational message before attempting to conquer the Land…
(and perhaps indicative of why Moses perhaps was no longer the best choice to
lead the Israelites).
It could be that some would be inspired to show Moses that
his cynicism was misplaced, and his harsh words undeserved. It’s possible that this was Moses’s goal – to
make himself the villain, so that the Israelites would be distracted from the
powerful enemies they were about to face in battle. By suggesting the Israelites had something to
prove and did not deserve the Land, perhaps they’d fight harder in order to
prove Moses wrong.
However, my inclination is that most of us would respond
negatively to such speech. Hateful words
and aggressive name-calling don’t often imbue confidence or a desire to
please. Rather, what if Moses had framed
his speech such that he was empowering the Israelites, as the inheritors of a
unique and special covenant their ancestors made with the Divine, to achieve
the dream they had been striving towards their entire lives, and to fulfill
their ultimate destiny (with God’s continued care and assistance)? I know that with such framing, I’d be a bit
more willing to put my life on the line…
How we speak to one another and how we frame issues has a
significant impact on how others respond to us (and vice versa).
This Shabbat, reflect on how you frame conversations. When you want / need something done and ask
another for assistance, or are trying to motivate another to act, how are you
framing your desires? Are you
contextually empowering the other to assist you (or themselves) meaningfully?
Does your tone suggest appreciation and a sense of valuing the other? Are you
saying “thank you” often enough?
By aspiring to better frame the conversations we engage in,
we can both better motivate and express gratitude to one another, in our collective
efforts to fulfill our own destinies.
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